Everyone Hates America!

Conservative wingnut braintrust Madame Malkin has done it again. Yup… I didn’t think it possible, but she managed to turn the booing of Miss America at the Miss Universe pageant in Mexico City, and turn it into… wait for it MEXICANS HATE AMERICA!!!!

Holy crap! I never knew. They hate us, and obviously there is only one course of action for us to take. We must bomb the ever living shit out of them until they like us, kinda like we did with Iraq, because, you know that worked awesomely well.

As anyone knows the way to get people to welcome you with candies and flowers is to invade their country, and kill a bunch of people. That’ll do it.

After all, how dare ANY country hate America? Where do they get off as sovereign nations not under American rule to dis us? Our course is clear, the path is set, we must wage a holy war against all peoples until they come to see how great America is. Countries swapping out their old flag for ours is preferable, I mean, why not just turn Mexico into another state, yeah?

The funny thing here is this better than thou tone that Michelle takes, like Americans don’t boo! Apparently, Michelle has never watched professional sports, or Michael Richards doing a stand up routine. I mean really.

She tripped, and fell, of course people are going to boo. And yeah, sometimes things do get tense between us and our Southern neighbor, but you know something, if you don’t like people not liking you, quit doing things that piss them off. You either have a country like you, or you piss them off, you don’t get to do both, so pick one Michelle. If you’re going to be one of these illegal aliens are evil, and we should militarize the border types, that’s cool, but don’t expect them to be happy about it, okay?

Now, here’s the part that Michelle leaves out. Yes, Ms. Smith got booed, but with a little poise and grace on her part, and a little by the audience, by the end of the night, our Miss America garnered applause and laughter from the audience.

So I suppose people are making political hay out of the event, but you know something? It’s an effing BEAUTY PAGEANT! Get over yourselves.