The Oblivious Guest

Created: April 10th, 2008 | Written By: Kyle E. Moore

We’ve all met at least one person that fits this discription at least once in our lives. You know the type. Comes over when invited, but after numerous hints that they should go they just keep on talking, completely obvlivious to any indicators that their welcome has been effectively worn out.

You say, “It’s late, you should go,” but they keep on jabbering about work, or the weather, or whatever. You take the food and drink out of their hand, they start munching mindlessly at the table cloth. You change into your pajamas and go to bed, they just keep on talking to the wallpaper as though it really has an opinion whether or not the Niners have a shot this year.

Meet our administration, ladies and gentlemen.

George Bush:

We are there at the invitation of the Iraqi government. This is a sovereign nation. Twelve million people went to the polls to approve a constitution. It’s their government’s choice. If they were to say, leave, we would leave.

Iraq’s Prime Minister Nouri al Maliki:

The prime minister told Bush during a 20-minute telephone conversation on Wednesday that Iraqi security forces are capable of carrying out their duties and U.S. troops should be pulled out as the situation permits, according to a senior government adviser who sat in on the phone conversation. He spoke on condition of anonymity because he was not authorized to disclose the confidential details.

General David Petraeus:

In his morning testimony, Petraeus said he has recommended to his superiors that the military continue rolling back a “surge” of U.S. forces that President Bush ordered last year in response to deteriorating security in Baghdad and other parts of Iraq. But after U.S. forces are reduced to their pre-buildup level by mid-July, Petraeus said, the military should suspend the withdrawals and begin a 45-day period of “consolidation and evaluation.”

At the end of that period, he said, he has recommended starting “a process of assessment to examine the conditions on the ground and, over time, determine when we can make recommendations for further reductions.” He strongly counseled against setting any deadlines for withdrawal.

Shorter: Maliki, “You drank all our beer, ate all our food, and it’s three in the morning. You need to go.” US, “You been following the Final Four? How about that ‘Merican Idol?”