God Smites The Gays

No, I’m not kidding.  You see, the whole reason for the wildfires out in California have nothing to do with the Santa Ana winds at all, and everything to do with the fact that God hates gays, and he’s not taking it anymore.

Of course, if this is true, God’s timing might be off by a wee bit.

You see, if God really wanted to send a message to the people of California that they were pissing him off by letting the gays get married, he might have tried to smite them with a wildfire when same sex marriage was first made legal earlier this year by the courts.  Instead, this may come off as a sort of mixed signal considering that God has chosen to smite California right after a proposition was passed banning same sex marriage.

I mean, I’m confused, how about you?  If he wanted his message to be more clear, wouldn’t he have gotten on with all the smiting back when gay marriage was first ruled legal, not when it was made illegal again?

And more to the point, if this was really the God of renowned gay hater and God lover Fred Phelps, wouldn’t God have chosen to smite the pro gay areas like West Hollywood and San Francisco?  So, apparently Gay Hating God not only has really crappy timing, but his aim’s a bit off too, considering his wildfires are attacking God fearing areas of California.

And why bother with California anyway?  Why not go after Connecticut where gay marriage is allowed?  Or Massechussetts (I think?)?

But wait, James Hartline KNOWS this is God smiting the gays because he can hear God’s voice, apparently in the fire itself, and apparently God is saying “I really hate gays, and so I’m torching your state!”

Or maybe someone slipped James some acid–could go either way.

The sad thing is, this isn’t even an original lunatic rant; Glen Beck already pulled this schtick before, only replace teh gayz with teh Amerika haterz.  *sigh* That’s the problem with “acts of God.”  Too many people are way too eager to assign motive.

3 Responses to “God Smites The Gays”

  1. Craig says:

    As a Christian, these are the kind of people that make me roll my eyes and who, I believe, hurt the Christian witness for those with a more realistic stance toward the bible. They also seem to end up being the kind of people with some rather dark secrets in their own lives.

  2. Kathy says:

    Actually, Kyle, those people have it backwards. The Santa Ana fires are because God is smiting the homophobes who voted Yes on Prop 8, not the gays.

  3. PirateRo says:

    Don’t try to apply logic to this situation. The thing single best thing these attention whores want is just that – attention. Just ignore them and continue educating the people around you. Addressing this crap directly only serves to increase their exposure and elevate their ridiculous position.

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